Dialectical Thinking

and clean sweaters

Two things can be true at once, we learn in dialectical behavior therapy (thank you my friend Bari Platter!). We are not that limited. Our brains can handle it. We can learn to digest it and not have to take a hard left or right turn on things. This shouldn’t have to be stated, it should be implied. It should be the default. But it’s not, so we are forced to apologize for our views on things because the assumption is if you think one thing, you don’t think the other.

I’m calling bullshit on that and have decided to eliminate the disclaimers. So, if one more Jew says to me that they support Israel, BUT…I’m going to call them on it. I’m not sure how, but I’m sick of the virtue signaling. They are, in effect, making sure you know that even though they believe Israel has the moral obligation to destroy Hamas, you’d better know that they are good people.

I am Jewish. I support Israel. I want the hostages alive and home, and I want us to eliminate Hamas. All those things are true.

You know what can’t seem to exist simultaneously? My ability to get more than one thing done. My ability to focus on more than one thing at any given time in my life. For the first time in my life I am forgetting appointments, I’m forgetting tasks, I’m not completing things before I move on to the next. I have had a writing group scheduled to start tonight for months. Months! What did I do last week? Insisted that I was free on Monday night to see a couple of my friends, made some concrete plans with them and then woke up early this morning and realized that I was scheduled to be in two places at one time.

The one task I seem to be able to complete effectively when I’m in this state of disarray is laundry. I have cleaned items in my house that have not been cleaned in months. I have washed sweaters that have not been washed in years. I didn’t know you could put sweaters in the wash, but since I discovered that cold water is an option, I am able to clean my years-old wool sweaters without destroying them. No dryer, I know.

This is my go-to when I can’t get things done. I suppose it makes me feel productive even when I’m about to lose friends because I can’t commit to plans, lose my job because I can’t get it done, and potentially lose a lot of money by paying for activities that I never end up attending.

I will be unemployed and without any friends - but goddamnit! – my clothes and linens will smell clean and fresh. And apparently, according to this ad, I will have beautiful legs and learn how to position myself sex-kitten-like in front of my washer.